I hear women get lots of emails when they use online dating. “Lots” doesn’t tell me any darn thing though. I like to know what I’m dealing with.
What’s the competition look like out there? I want the numberssss!!!
Ohh-yeah– Time for an experiment and you know how the eDatingDoc loooves experiments!
I needed to turn this “Lots” into something I could understand. Sooooo what did I do?
Pssshhh – the only thing I could do…
I dressed up like a chic, took some photos & joined okCupid.
Ok not really
But dammit, I do make a sexy girl don’t I?! Don’t hate mofos!!
This is what I really did:
Me, Francesca aka The eDating Pin-up and a couple of her friends picked out some of their sexy photos…
and created a few profiles on the different dating sites.
aka Zombie Bait
I tested 3 ages for these gorgeous young ladies: Age 28 , 34 & 45
Francesca – Age 34
Sofia – Age 28
Claire – Age 44
We created profiles on:
- Plenty of Fish
First up was okCupid:
I set the bait then checked it the next day.
This is what I saw:
Whaaaa! 39 messages & 80 likes in 1 day!
Claire got 22 new messages & 53 likes!
And Sofia got 37 messages!
With women getting that many messages in 1 day…
How can you survive dating in this apocalypse? Easy, I got the cure, find out in a sec…
Next up – What is it like for women dating on POF?
I obviously had some good bait
I wanted to see what would happen if we used some of the girls photos that were not SO smokin’ hot. We toned it down and went for cute this time.
I set the Zombie Bait then checked back the next day…
This is what I saw:
Zombies on Plenty of Fish be THIRSTY!
Next – How many messages do women get on Match.com
This time I wanted to see the Zombies in action and how long it took them to strike.
I set the bait on Monday at 8am.
Zombies should be at work so I thought it would take a while…
I started a timer & waited…
I WAS WRONG! They start to pile in:
All 3 women get over 20 messages in just 6 hours on a Monday at noon…
WTF!? Don’t zombies work?
And the most Zombies of all… Tinder & Bumble!
All three women max out the match count within 24 hours with 99 pending matches…
That’s a lot of Zombies!
So why do I say Zombies?
- Because 99.999% of those messages were mindless
- Their written profiles were mind-numbing…
- Their photos STANK!
Same “attraction killing” mistakes, over and over and OVER and O-V-E-R!!!!
“They all love living life to the fullest.” Blah Blah Yeah right Mr. Zombie…
Creating a profile or sending messages that are just “ok” won’t cut it either. Being “ok” will get lost in the busting-full-email-inbox of that hottie.
Sooo how are you suppose to succeed in online dating with so much competition?
Eeeeeasy, if you do what I teach…
And guess what? I’m teaching guys this everyday.
Soooo pay attention Zombie-Defeater-To-Be…
And you’ll stand out in the mind of beautiful & compatible women Like there’s a giant flashing neon sign over your head, and guess what it says?
That’s right awesome-sauce…
So don’t be a Zombie.
Go here next:
Match has absolutely tons of fake hot profiles to lure men to subscribe and of course all the sites have scammers (I was traveling in Romania and lost my passport and plane ticket could you send me a few bucks to get me home….) lurking behind hot photos. Generally if an insanely hot girl messages me directly (with my crappy profile) then I assume she is running a scam. What is the easiest way to filter out the fakes?
I don’t really pay attention to the fakes Drew. They’re usually pretty easy to pick out.
I do get the messages you mention but rarely, like two a year. If it’s a girl from another country or not in my area, that’s definitely the “red flag” and I wouldn’t waste my time with a girl in some other country anyway.
When you’re searching profiles, the fakes usually have one or two very generic looking “modely” photos.
sheezez, this was a funny and informative.
Im sold man, gonna buy your stuff!
Yo Ben- Glad you enjoyed it! lol
Radio Wright I think you should pop the question to The eDating Pin-up after your 150 Date challenge.
You’re spending all this time with her and helping her fight off zombies. It’s the natural thing to do.
I did Kenin… After fighting off Zombies all day it was time to relax so I popped the: “Let’s get tequila shots?” question…
Yeah, um, I’m a fairly attractive 32 year old woman and I’ve NEVER had the amount of emails this chick has had on ANY dating site I’ve ever been on. Why, I don’t know because I’ve done my damndest to put up a great headshot and good “action” photos. I wrote an intelligent, witty essay with good anecdotes describing the kind, generous, fun person I am. I’ve never had the kind of response this chick got. The amount of emails I’ve gotten on Match in one YEAR pales in comparison to the amount she got in one day. Guys, this is your takeaway: QUIT pestering all the hotties who won’t give you the time of day and WAKE UP, because odds are, you’re passing over a really awesome woman. I might not have model looks like this girl, but guys do notice me in my everyday life. Stop being so damn hung up on the hot chicks and you might find yourself a real gem, if you just took the time to really notice!
Hmmm – I’d like to take a look at your profile. I’ll send you a private email.
Amen sista! The majority of hotties have always gotten everytHing they wanted just by doing nothing and looking pretty. The rest of Regular Women haVe had to actually deVelop a perSonality to Get a guy’s attention. (In my case i learned to sing and play guitar) Guys, Lower your beauty standards and you’ll find a woman who is likely smart, funny, talented, and sociable. And she’ll still be all those things 30 years down the rOad. What will the hottie have?
Radio Wright i have a lot of theories and informal research and data on the subject of human behaviour online. I wonder how different our findings are, men vs. Women. I’D be more than happy to share, so these guys can land themselves a keeper.
I don’t think its luck @ wishihadherluck. Personally, I haven’t gotten hundreds in a day, but I can get 30+ on a good day. But it sucks still because as Radio mentioned you have fish through so many to find one decent email/profile. Honestly it’s exhausting! For the love of god men, ‘hey’ or ‘how ya doing, sexy?’ or any variation there of is not a good online conversation starter with a stranger.
Also, I can go from a 3-4 to a 9 in an hour. Make up, decent clothes, awesome hair. Hair is key! When it comes to great photos: lighting, good angles, and optical zoom! Release YOUR inner hot chick baby. We all got one 😉 I hope Radio can help.
Radio, I really enjoyed this! I look forward to reading more. Keep educating them zombies, Sir. 😉 Maybe you should consider teaming up with Ms. e-Pin Up and doing a similar ‘how to’ for the ladies. That’d be awesome!
I’ve been using OKCupid and PlentyOfFakes for about a month this time around and as a guy its pretty bleak out there trying to find a date little alone something real… In my area I’ve hand written over 50 ladies and opened/viewed/read 100s of profiles, but in response I’ve gotten 7 messages in 32 days… Most are less then 10 words and range from the “Thanks for the compliment” to as simple a brush off as “Hello” and nothing more… I understand being a single woman is ridiculous online, but damn… I feel like chop liver…
There is a 100% chance that something is off either with your profile, photos and/or messages.
Based on that “Thanks for the compliment” response I know something can be improved with your messaging. There are specific things you should and should not say when you message a woman online Daniel that make a huge difference.
Also, free websites are no where near as good as paid sites Daniel. When a woman is paying her money to be on a site, then you know she’s more interested in actually meeting someone.
Thanx for the reply Radio… I’ve been back on OKCupid and PoF for a little over a month and with 7 messages and only about 30 views seems like a failure to me, but I’m not at a point where I know if your academy is worth the price to me right now… if anyone wants to take a look PoF SN is DanWithAPlan209… OKCupid is DHarmon1980…
I just looked at your profile… one word – DISASTER
Dude, you have a picture of you with your step daughter and only what I assume is your wife?
I’ve been on match for over a year and a half. The result I got from it is pretty disappointing. I’ve sent hundreds of messages but rarely get any reply. I assume many of the profiles on there is through people who did not renew but match keep them there for marketing purposes. For example I stop paying for my account but match still send me messages that people have viewed my profile. I found that I get better result with the free sites like POF and OKCupid. I did not generate any dates with Match but had gone on dates with POF and OKCupid. What are your thoughts should I go back to Match?
I sent you a private video response Kenneth. One thing I see here is that when you search for women on Match, it sounds like you were not filtering them based on activity date. That’s a must so you don’t waste your time messaging women that are no longer on the site.
Do the good finish first.
Depends on what you mean by “good” James. Good Guy usually means a push-over that is scared of any kind of confrontation so he never voices his needs but somehow magically expects his needs to be met. The other person never knows what the “Good” Guy truly feels or even who he really is. Why would someone want to be in a relationship with that kind of person?
Perhaps it’s because I grew up with 7 brothers, but I’m the attractive, smart, quick-witted, sports-fanatic little sister that would love to get your input on a female’s profile. Also, any recommendations on two best sites would be invaluable.
Sent you an email Dani-
This is fucking hilarious and informative! I am so glad you did this experiment and posted the results.
I figured this was the problem all along but I’m still not convinced there is a foolproof way for someone to reply to your email. if that were the case you would have the answers to all email marketing
Hey there Robert,
There are definitely no foolproof ways to get a response online. Some ways are just better than others. Let me know if you have any questions about anything.
Why would any site do it differently than eHarmony? I’m a guy and realize that the main issue is “Ms Right” getting bombarded with mindless emails. eHarmony limits the experience to about a dozen matches a day where she looks at me and I look at her. It’s like a dozen first impressions and, because its only a few, its fun. I’ve been on the site two weeks and am already having nice on-going, let’s get to know one another conversations with five lovely women.
Another thing I don’t get from guys. If they would be patient they might find ladies contacting them that they approached a week ago, or so. The trick- change your profile a little and do it often. This sends a notice to all of your potential matches and keeps you in their mind. A good profile is wonderful. Exciting, interesting updates will blow their socks off!
Im from south Africa I ve been on a few sites and its all about your pictures that you put up that is how they see it not so important what you write.
There’s probably a zombie quality hidden somewhere in my profile, but I’m not sure what it is or where it is. I knew all the cliches when I wrote it and made a conscious effort to avoid them, so I’m not sure what it is that’s wrong.